Passover, or Pesach in Hebrew, is an eight-day festival celebrating the Jewish people’s liberation from slavery in ancient Egypt. A central observance of Passover is the prohibition against eating leavened bread (chametz). Jews are also obligated to remove all traces of chametz from their homes. This requires a thorough cleaning effort in the weeks leading up to Passover. Every space is scoured – cupboards, drawers, kitchens, even under beds and refrigerators – to eliminate any stray crumbs. This intense cleaning process can be stressful, so here’s a joke to bring some humor to the task:
Impossible Timing:
Samuel, a devout Jewish man and a successful financial analyst from Brooklyn, accepted a Vice President position at a brokerage firm in Utah, a state known for its large Mormon population.
Upon learning of Samuel’s hiring, some members of the company’s board pressured the president, stating, “We are religious people here. We can’t have a Jewish man handling our finances.”
The president initially resisted but eventually summoned Samuel to his office, explaining the situation. Samuel was given the option of converting to Mormonism or resigning from the high-paying job.
Feeling he had no choice, Samuel converted and informed his wife that they would begin attending church services on Sunday.
Months passed, and Samuel’s wife grew increasingly distressed by the conversion. “This is too hard for me,” she lamented. “I miss the Sabbath – lighting candles and blessing the wine. I miss the holidays. Money isn’t everything, Samuel.”
Her constant complaints weighed heavily on Samuel’s conscience. Overcome with guilt, he went to see the company president.
“I can’t continue like this,” Samuel confessed. “I am filled with regret. Money is not the most important thing. I can’t sleep, and neither can my wife. This burden is too much to bear. I was born a Jew, and I want to die a Jew. If you want me to resign, I will do so without complaint.”
The president looked at him with surprise. “Samuel, I had no idea this was so difficult for you. I thought it was a trivial matter. You don’t have to leave. Things can go back to the way they were before. You can stay here without converting.”
Samuel returned home overjoyed. Bursting through the door, he exclaimed to his wife, who was watching television, “You won’t believe it! It’s a miracle! We’re going back to being Jewish, and I still have my job!”
His wife glared at him, fire in her eyes. “Are you crazy?”
Samuel was taken aback. “But I thought this is what you wanted! You’ve been crying and complaining non-stop. Don’t you want to be Jewish again?”
His wife’s fury intensified. “Of course, I want to! Of course, I want to!” she retorted. “But now? Only a week before Passover?”