Conferences can be draining, and I was eagerly anticipating the end of this particular one. However, an incident in the men’s room provided a memorable, if slightly unsettling, anecdote.
While performing the necessary task at a urinal, I observed a man several stations down engaging in conversation with another. What truly shocked me was that during this exchange, the man mid-stream extended his hand for a handshake. This egregious violation of restroom protocol highlighted a need for a refresher on proper men’s room behavior.
Firstly, always observe the ‘buffer urinal’ rule. When selecting a urinal in a row, ensure at least one empty urinal separates you from your fellow user. Secondly, direct eye contact is strictly prohibited. A silent acknowledgment of shared plumbing is sufficient male bonding. Eyes forward, partner. Finally, under no circumstances should there be hand-to-hand contact during the act. A polite refusal, citing the importance of hand sanitization, is perfectly acceptable. While I maintain a high standard of personal hygiene, I cannot vouch for others.
Consider this a friendly reminder of the unspoken rules that govern male restroom conduct.